Eulogy for a friend: Maria Consuelo Mendez
I've been friends with Amelia and her mother, Maria, for a couple of decades. We became more closely acquainted when we attended the same house church together. When I told my children about Maria's death, my youngest daughter told me that one of the main reasons she enjoyed attending the house church was because she looked forward to seeing Maria. She recalled Maria acknowledging her each Sunday morning. Maria always made an effort to greet and talk and love on the children.
When Amelia asked if I would consider giving the eulogy at Maria's funeral, I couldn't refuse. It's funny because I accepted even though I knew almost nothing about her life. I knew her as one of the kindest people I have ever met and such a lover of God, but I didn't even know her last name.
Amelia, Woody and I met a couple of days prior to the funeral so I could learn more about Maria and what she desired for her funeral. What Amelia shared thrilled me! I heard the testimony of a transformed life - actually several lives - which included Maria's mother. Maria's kindness, love of people, and deep desire for others to know and walk with the same God that she served all made sense as Amelia shared her story with us. Here's the eulogy that I was happy to give at her funeral:
My name is Rick Murata and I'm here with my wife Woody. We have been friends with Amelia and Maria for many years. You may be wondering why is this English speaking Japanese guy speaking at the funeral of a Guatemalan woman? You may not know this, but Maria and I were both adopted into the same family. We actually share the same Father. Our relationship was enabled by the blood of Jesus and our friendship forged by the Holy Spirit that dwelt within us both. So you see we are indeed relatives of the heavenly kind.
Maria Consuelo, or Connie, was born as the eldest daughter to Amelia and Alfredo Paz in Guatemala. She was the 2nd born and eldest girl. The sickness and death of her older brother led to a difficult time early on for her family. And it ultimately led to the departure of her father. Her mother struggled to survive and had to leave their home at times to try and earn money. She gave Maria, now a young teen, the responsibility to care for the house and her sisters while she was away. Maria was good at it and became a mama to her sisters and others in need.
A major turn came in Maria's life when the wife of an American couple living in Guatemala became sick with hepatitis. Needing assistance, Maria became her caregiver which provided much needed income to the family. When the couple decided to return to the US, they offered Maria the opportunity to come with them to continue to help with their family. She resisted but they convinced her and her mother that she could provide much needed income to her family by leaving and working for them in the US. So at 16 years of age, Maria left Guatemala for New Jersey. Her move to the US indeed provided for her family back in Guatemala but, perhaps of even greater value, provided an avenue for many other family members to come to the US.
Maria's mother was a deeply religious woman who knew about God but didn't really know God. One day, she came to a complete understanding of faith in Christ and she became a new person full of love and joy. This God that had seemed so far away and distant despite her religious endeavors had come to her. She opened her home to others who also came to know Christ. Soon the home was full of life and praise and worship.
After several years, Maria returned home to Guatemala but she didn't want to have any part of the new faith that her mother had found despite now seeing the transformation of her mother in person. Maria remained unconvinced and wanted to continue living her life as she now desired. She pushed back against the efforts of her mother and others to learn about and to experience a real faith as they now knew to be true.
But a mishap staged the way for change. Maria seriously broke her leg and was bed bound for many months waiting for the healing to complete. She became incredibly angry at her situation and was now even more irritated by the constant flow of people that came to the house to seek fellowship with each other, and to worship and pray together to the Lord. She refused their offers to pray for her healing and counted the days when she could be free from the cast and from being around these people.
But when the time came for the doctor to remove her cast and to check her leg, they discovered that the bones in her leg had set incorrectly and would need to be rebroken and reset again. Maria was to be immobilized for several more months. With the news, Maria was now even more angry and bitter and resisted those that wanted to pray for her with a greater zeal. But there was one woman who remained persistent and Maria eventually took a moment to listen and to hear of this Jesus and this 'good news' that this woman desired to share.
When Maria heard and finally humbled her heart, her eyes were opened. She suddenly saw the sin of her life and she wept in deep sorrow and repentance for some time. But the love of God came upon her and the Spirit of the living God enveloped her and filled her. And all at once, she understood what had taken place to her mother and to all these crazy people who had been coming to her house. She now understood why they wanted to pray for her. Jesus was real, and more than that, willing to come directly to a person and make Himself known. He filled her with a love and peace and joy that words cannot convey and knowledge can't comprehend.
This is the Maria that I met some decades ago. And despite the passage of time from when the Lord first visited her long ago in Guatemala - that same love, that same peace, and that same joy burned deeply within her. That love extended to many of you and we will miss it dearly. It is the Maria that many of you knew.
So here today, on this day, we honor and remember Maria. With her life in mind, let us look forward to a time and a place that awaits us all. We can find it in the book of Revelation.
Revelation 20:11-15Then I saw a great white throne and Him who sat upon it, from whose presence earth and heaven fled away, and no place was found for them. And I saw the dead, the great and the small, standing before the throne, and books were opened; and another book was opened, which is the book of life; and the dead were judged from the things which were written in the books, according to their deeds. And the sea gave up the dead which were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead which were in them; and they were judged, every one of them according to their deeds. Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. This is the second death, the lake of fire. And if anyone’s name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire.
Maria's book is complete. Her work is done. No further words are to be written. She has finished her time here on earth. No prayers or money or persuasion can change what is written. But great news - we know of her testimony and we witnessed God's fingerprints in her life. Because of these things, we know that Maria's name is written in the book of life and we rejoice!
But with Maria's departure, let us take time to love and support those who remain here on earth.
I ask that you remember Maria’s grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Death is something that we should not shield our young children from, but they may need a careful, loving hand to guide them through these moments. Let's point them to the Master and to His presence that can help them through these times. Let’s remind them of the hope of eternal life that only faith in Jesus can bring. Maria would want for you to pick up where she left off and to pray for them that they too would know the incredible love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
I ask that you remember Amelia. Maria and Amelia would joke that when Amelia was born that the umbilical cord was never cut. I think that every time I saw Maria, I would see Amelia! And every time I would see Amelia, I would see Maria! The two appeared inseparable. And they remained so even during the past months of Maria's life. And though the last weeks and days were taxing as Amelia struggled to care for Maria’s failing earthly body, the sudden quiet and absence is very difficult. And her grief is real. I ask that you prayerfully seek a time to make a phone call, send a card, bake some cookies and love on this sweet child of the King.
When Woody and I buried our 7 month old son some years ago, we were enveloped with love from several brothers and sisters in Christ. We had heard that 'shared joy is twice the joy, and shared sorrow is half the sorrow'. We were grateful to those who shared our sorrow.
Maria was a seamstress and a quilter. She sewed and stitched many things over her years. While many of us may look at fabric and thread and admire its pattern or colors, a seamstress can see the materials and visualize a garment, a pillow, a bedspread. They can see the practicality and marriage of the materials and can picture a value for each component and a way to create a useful product.
Maria looked at many of you with the eye of a seamstress. To her, she saw some of you as bolts of fabric and spools of thread. You are material of great worth and beauty. But you were never meant to remain on the bolt or on the spool. You were made for a greater purpose! She saw how the Master had carefully formed and fashioned each of you with your unique gifts. So Maria prayed that each of you would come to your complete potential. She prayed that you would humble yourselves and come to the only real Father that she ever knew - the Father that gives abundant life here on earth and a promise of eternal life afterwards. She knew that in the Father’s care, you would understand and know His purpose and you would find the love and peace that only the great Master can give. She knew that in the hands of the Master Seamster, you will be fashioned for the greatest purpose - His purpose.
Some of you once knew the love and the peace and joy of the Father but have fallen away. The cares of this world, the deceitfulness of riches and other things have crept into your lives and you now feel so distant from God. You may look to yourself in shame and feel a sense of hopelessness. But Maria saw you differently and she prayed for you too! She saw you and she tried not to lose hope. She prayed that you would flee those who darken your eyes and those who fill your ears with things that are untrue. She prayed that you would come and cling to the One who brings the eternal cup of wine and the bread everlasting.
Just as a quilter takes a garment in tatters and carefully cuts out the parts of the fabric that are whole and useful, she knew that the Lord saw the greater things in you. Alone you may not be able to see how the mess that you've made of your life could possibly be useful for anything. But the heavenly Quilter will take that patch of cloth and carefully join it to another, and another, and another. Pretty soon those once seemingly useless pieces come together to form a heavenly quilt. In fact more than a quilt, but rather a holy tabernacle for the King.
As we mourn our loss, and as we ponder, and as we celebrate Maria's life will you each take a moment right now to consider her pleas? You, the fabric. You, the thread. You, the tattered piece of cloth. Maria is no longer here with us to pray for you. But there is One who knows and sees you. He stands waiting and desiring for you to come. He is the Ancient of Days, the Prince of Peace, the Lord of Lords, and the King of Kings. Please know that this was Maria's greatest desire: to see each of you enveloped in the fullness of the same love and hope of the Father that she knew. This was her greatest legacy. This is your heritage.
佳信
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